As a pastor's wife, Cindi McMenamin, knows a thing or two about praying for husbands. Marriage can be such a beautiful reflection of God's love, it's no wonder Satan wants to attack it. Cindi highlights 10 ways the Enemy tries to get at your husband's life, and offers advice on how to pray
Your husband struggles with attack daily.
He may not talk with you about it, but the struggle is real. Sometimes the attack is from his own flesh. Sometimes it’s a natural consequence of living in a sinful world. And sometimes it’s a direct assault from his “adversary the devil [who] prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8, ESV).
You can grab hold of a strategy outlined in Scripture to thwart Satan’s attack against your husband. Scripture commands believers to “be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might” and to “put on the whole armor of God” so that we can “stand against the schemes of the devil.” Furthermore, we are told that “we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places” (Ephesians 6:10-13, ESV).
When we, as wives, suit up in the armor of God (which basically means to cover ourselves in the character of Christ and pray in the Spirit at all times), we can—through faith and God’s Word – “extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one” (verse 16).
Those flaming darts are hurled at several areas of your husband's life. So here are 10 areas of your husband's life to pray against Satan’s attack:
Pray For Husband's Life 1: His Drive for Success
Most men want to feel successful and do well in their careers. But some take it too far and become obsessed with climbing the corporate ladder to the harm of family and friends. This is the lure of status, prestige, and power. The world will tell him this is important and this is where he finds his value and significance.
Pray that your husband clearly sees his worth and significance in Christ. Not in the accolades from the workplace or an area in which he excels. Ask God to press upon him to want to succeed as a man of God. And to realize he will be held accountable before God not for how many hours he put into the office but for how he invested in what God gave him (his wife, family, and talents to serve the body of Christ).
Lord, cultivate in my husband a drive and desire to serve You more than any other person or thing. Close his ears to how the world around him defines success and whisper to Him how You define it – to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with his God(Micah 6:8).
Pray For Husband's Life 2: His Desire for More
Is your man content? If so, that’s an area that Satan wants to undermine by convincing him he needs more –more electronic gadgets, more sound in his home theater, more stuff in his garage, more toys out on the lake, and so on.
Scripture says “But godliness with contentment is great gain, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world” (1 Timothy 6:6-7).
Lord, help my husband to be content with all You have given him, and to ignore Satan’s – and the world’s – lure that he must have more. Help him to be eternally minded, not wanting to store up treasures on earth, but desiring treasure in heaven where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in and steal (Matthew 6:19-20).
Pray For Husband's Life 3: His Belief That He Can Do it Alone
If Satan can isolate your man he can more easily divide him. My husband calls this area of a man’s life “The Rambo Reflex” and said “It’s the error of thinking a man doesn't need help, doesn't need advice, and can handle all of his problems on his own. Besides, there's no one I can trust anyway, he thinks. That’s a lie. And it’s from the pit of hell.”
God designed us to live in community. First and foremost, he gave your husband a helper – you (Genesis 2:18). He also designed the church to come alongside one another and support each other. Pray that your husband will receive help, friendship, support, and encouragement from his brothers in Christ (if he is a believer) or from godly men who care about him.
Lord, surround my husband with men of God who will care deeply about him, reach out to him, and remind him he is not alone.
Pray For Husband's Life 4: His Eyes and Thought-Life
Because he’s a man, your husband is visually wired in a way that you and I, as women, will never fully understand. Therefore, the temptation for sexual lust is waiting for him around every corner. Every man faces sexual temptation whether it's in print, digitally, or a real woman he sees from a distance or works with closely. Your man is bombarded with sexual images every day on television, on freeway billboards, or on social media. What once was available only by walking into an adult theatre or through purchasing an adult magazine, is now easily accessible on any laptop or smartphone. So, pray for him to surrender his temptations to God as soon as lustful thoughts begin to enter his mind.
Lord, guard my husband’s eyes, filter his thoughts, and convict his heart so that he immediately surrenders to You whatever causes him to begin to lust. Keep his mind pure and don’t let images stay in his mind and begin to lure his heart away.
Pray For Husband's Life 5: His Fear of Failure
Men dread failure and appearing weak or not having what it takes. So the enemy aims his attack at your husband’s self-confidence and character. He also feels the attack when it comes to his sense of responsibility ("I'm a horrible provider,” "I'll never get ahead of these bills,” "My wife and kids deserve better,” “I'll never achieve my dreams").
Henry David Thoreau wrote: “The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation. From the desperate city, you go into the desperate country, and have to console yourself with the bravery of minks and muskrats. A stereotyped but unconscious despair is concealed even under what are called the games and amusements of mankind. There is no play in them, for this comes after work.”
Lord, may my husband find his sense of worth not in what he does (or in what he succeeds at), but in Whom he knows. Remind him that as he brings his heart before You, You are pleased, regardless of how he performs. And help him to remember that He is “fearfully and wonderfully” made (Psalm 139:14), and whatever he fails at is part of Your overall design to shape his character and teach him to lean on You for his strength.
Pray For Husband's Life 6: His Fear of Weakness
Fear can paralyze a man from doing what he knows deep in his heart he's supposed to do: Stand up to his controlling boss, confront the dad of his son's friend who let them do something foolish, risk having that argument with his wife, take his family to church, talk to his neighbor about Christ, and so on.
God has not given your husband the spirit of fear, but of power and love and self-control (2 Timothy 1:7).
Lord, Your Word says “Perfect love casts out fear” (1 John 4:18). Help my husband to love You perfectly and therefore, to trust You immensely so that there is no room for fear. Make him a man of courage because he trusts in You.
Pray For Husband's Life 7: His Tendency Toward Complacency
The attack of complacency comes in many different forms: neglecting priorities and responsibilities, feeling comfortable with the status quo in his job when he's capable of more, or watching the house fall down around his family while he pops another beer and watches three more hours of sports. Complacency also occurs in his marriage when he stops trying and adopts an “it’s good enough” attitude.
Lord, don’t let my husband be content with status quo. Help him to give to You the lure to be lazy, the feeling that he’s tired of trying, and the sense of defeat that leads to complacency.
Pray For Husband's Life 8: His Male Ego
Some men are raised to believe they're supposed to be bullies, tough to the point where they don't have any empathy or sympathy. It’s a "big boys don't cry" attitude and it’s based in pride and a lack of compassion. “Never display any weakness” they are taught. And every issue is solved best by a fist-fight.
This may not be your man. But the temptation is there to default into the tough guy who must prove his manliness through brute force. Pray that your husband embraces the fruits of the Spirit that will make him more like Christ.
Lord, help my husband to surrender to Your Spirit’s control and develop Your character, particularly love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).
Pray For Husband's Life 9: His Ability to Go Silent or Passive
According to my husband – a pastor who has led men’s groups for more than 20 years – the attack sounds something like this: "Just don't say anything,” “Just don't get involved,” "It's not your problem,” "It won't make a difference anyway,” “No one wants to hear what you have to say,” "Don't you have more important things to do?"
Lord, don’t let Satan tempt my man to resign into passivity and not take a stand. Give him a zealousness for the truth and to be active, involved, and present in the affairs of his marriage, family, workplace, and church.
Pray For Husband's Life 10: His Heart for God
I often hear from wives whose husbands once loved and served God with a passion, but something happened to steal their hearts away. Sometimes it’s PTSD, a slow-growing addiction, the lure of another woman, another “high”, or another lifestyle.
Pray that your husband’s heart will constantly seek God, and never settle for less.
Lord, keep my husband’s heart close to you. Don’t let him entertain anything that will divide his heart and cause him to compromise his faith, his marriage, his parenting, his work, or his health. Convince him that his greatest “high” and his deepest sense of fulfillment will only be found in You. Be his joy, his Rock, his Loving Father, his Warrior King and his heart’s delight.
Cindi McMenamin is a national speaker and award-winning writer who helps women and couples find strength for the soul. She is the author of several books including When Women Walk Alone, When a Woman Inspires Her Husband and When Couples Walk Together, which she co-wrote with her pastor/husband, Hugh. Her next book, 12 Ways to Experience More with Your Husband, releases in February 2018. For more information and free resources to strengthen your soul, marriage, or parenting, see her website: www.StrengthForTheSoul.com.
Credit: Crosswalk / Cindi McMenamin
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